Thursday, June 28, 2007

Being Abhishek

At dawn, on August 9th, 1981, the birds chirruped and conveyed the arrival of a divine incarnated child. The word 'divine' represents holiness of the mother. It was the day of bliss, elation and celebration! The mother's happiness was impossible to explain in words. Of course! Would that be possible?The child never knew about the celebrations happening around!

Heh heh...I just cannot portray an brag about me. I was born just like all of us. I am no special and that poetic description can be ignored...royally!

That was some history about my birth. However, every year when the calender shows August 9, I wish I had the power to go back, sit on a cloud and view some memorable moments of my years! I never was obsessed with techonology as a kid. Little did I realize that one day I'd be sitting on my chair and writing this blog?


I have certain weirdo instincts in me. I react to situations that could best be when left alone, and do not react to situations that need my involvement. I cannot excess love anyone or shower my affection except my mother. My care does'nt include hugging or kissing or giving a materialistic view of affection. Its very raw and when people knew that I care, they'd realize it..somehow! There is another reason, a genuine reason why I escape these celebrity moments. It’s because I’m awkward at expressing. For example, to my sister, I am not a traditional brother and I don’t make the periodic phone calls inquiring about her health and family. But its not because I don't care. Somehow after the initial niceties, I’m at loss of words about how to pursue the conversation.

I am very lazy when it comes to traditions, beliefs and formalities. I do not greet people like good morning, because I don't understand what's so good about the morning? However, If someone greets me, I'd be quick to reciprocate. This attitude of mine has led to several problems, for people. Not me. They want me to think their perspective which I cannot. Perhaps I’m too selfish to be duty bound. Or perhaps I’m just too shy. Strangely, I’ve remained detached from the worldly anxieties.

I was never sure what I wanted to become in life, While I was the restless soul driven by fleeting obsessions - at one time comics, to become a cartoonist, then fire crackers. I was a good student at school, However, after my 8th standard I had realized that family and life teaches everything. I do not blame the education system and not because my parents couldn't afford to out me in an posh boarding school. I am glad for what I am today.

Life was never a bed of roses for me, Thankfully! I grew up from being a coy, ackwardly dressed boy without any direction. I had a vast friends circle to whom I am grateful. Even today, I feel at ease when I am with my friends.

I am spiritual. But to me, spirituality is not about getting up early in the morning to do pooja or breaking coconuts in the temple or chanting mantras. I may be biased in saying this, but how could I possibly believe a priest who mutters mantras seem to convey my prayer to god? How many of us understand the language that he uses to communicate with god? I believe that the biggest spirituality comes in the form of trust and that trust need not be specific to mantras and rituals. I do not close my eyes while praying and my prayer doesn't even last for 2 minutes. Once in a month or two, I visit only Hanumanji temple.

I end this here, because I could possibly go on writing to eternity about me and my sensless character- if deemed.

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